21st Birthday Messages for Boys
If you’re looking for happy birthday wishes for boys, you’ve come to the right place. We find that the more specific you are with your message, the better. So if you choose one of the below, make sure to add something you love about the person to make them feel that much more special.
• Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, smarter than you think and loved more than you know! Congratulations on your 21st birthday!
• Happy happy 21st birthday! Always remember that life is not about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself. Wishing you all the best for the next chapter.
• Congratulations on reaching one of life’s biggest milestones! Your future looks so bright!
• As you turn 21 today, I was just reminiscing about all of your impressive achievements and all of the wonderful moments we have shared together. I hope that your 21st birthday marks a fabulous start to your adult life and that you are always blessed with great opportunities and exciting adventures!
Birthday Wishes for Sons Turning 21
Milestones like your 21st birthday can be really overwhelming. A great tip we’ve found for making it all a bit easier is to keep your message honest and brief. Don’t feel pressured to write long messages or sentiments that don’t resonate. We’ve got some examples below.
• When I turned 21, the times were simpler, slower and quite frankly, more boring. Today, 21 is your ticket to a new and exciting world. It’s time to celebrate! Happy 21st birthday my son!
• Only a few parents are privileged to be blessed with a gifted son like you. Happy 21st birthday to the best son in the whole wide world.
• No matter how many birthdays come and go, you’ll always be my little boy. Congratulations on your new chapter. I love you so much!
21st Birthday Messages for Girls
We’ve tracked down some lovely 21st birthday wishes for girls to help you get started! From what we’ve seen in our research, a sincere compliment goes a long way so don’t be scared to tell someone what you love about them.
• If there’s one person who makes me want to live for 1000 more years, it's you. Happy birthday my girl!
• The world is a much more beautiful place with you in it. I’m really glad you were born. Happy 21st birthday!
• Happy 21st! Your future does not lay in front of you, it lies deep inside you. When life becomes a rollercoaster, climb into the front seat, throw your arms in the air and enjoy the ride.
• Many congratulations on your 21st! Wishing you success and happiness on your very special birthday!
• 21 looks absolutely beautiful on you. May your beauty be as everlasting as the heavens. Happy 21st birthday!
Birthday Wishes for Daughters Turning 21
Watching your little girl grow up can be as sad as it is exciting. These conflicting emotions make it hard to put how you’re feeling into words. Read on for some suggestions of how to tell your daughter just how much she means to you.
• A daughter like you is more priceless than the most beautiful diamond. You are not only strong and wise, but kind and thoughtful as well. Happy 21st, sweetheart!
• For 21 years, I’ve watched you grow, change and mature. I have lived in awe of your ever-burning spirit and your unbridled passion for every second of those years. May your birthday shine as bright as you.
• A daughter is someone you can laugh with, dream with and love with all your heart. Happy 21st birthday my girl.
Every time I try to define beauty and grace, you come to mind. And with each new year, the definition gets even better.
• You are loved for the little girl you once were, the special woman you are now and the precious daughter you will always be. Congratulations on your 21st birthday, my girl!
Sincere 21st Birthday Wishes
A message written from the heart goes a long way. It lets the person know that you care and adds to the memory of the special occasion.
• Behind you all your memories. Before you all your dreams. Around you all that love you. Within you all you need. Happy 21st birthday!
• Your 21st birthday is a special time indeed, where you’re given the key that unlocks the door to your future! I hope that the path ahead is bright and kind to you. You’re a great person who deserves the very best in life! Happy birthday and many congratulations!
• Happy 21st birthday to someone who has a truly bright future ahead of them! I hope you have a fantastic day!
• A very happy 21st birthday to you! Congratulations! I hope that your day is filled with celebrations, and that on this very special day you’re surrounded by those who you love most in the world!
Funny 21st Birthday Messages
Starting a new year off with a laugh never hurt anyone! Adding a funny message is a great way to remind your loved one that adulthood isn’t all serious.
• Congratulations on turning 21! I hope your birthday is so great that you’ll need sunglasses to open the fridge in the morning.
• Time to celebrate your induction into full adulthood! Happy birthday!
• You know what they say about turning 21? Old enough to know better, and young enough not to care. Enjoy it! Happy birthday!
• Happy 21st birthday! Now that you’re getting older, I hope your last trip round the sun wasn’t too tiring.
• You’re 21! Now you can legally do everything you’ve been doing all along!
• Hope your birthday is twenty-onederful!
21st Birthday Quotes
Sometimes you read a quote that makes you think to yourself, ‘wow, I couldn’t have put it better myself!’ Quotes are a great source of inspiration and a nice addition to any 21st birthday message. They usually carry advice that’s withstood the test of time and can offer a bit of insight into what lies ahead. We’ve picked some that we think are perfect for starting a new chapter on the right foot.
• “The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” – Lucille Ball
• “The great thing about getting older is you don't lose all the other ages you've been.” – Madeleine L'Engle
• “Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it.” – Brigitte Bardot
• "Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake." – Edward Morykwas
• “Don't just count your years, make your years count.” – George Meredith
• “There are two great days in a person's life – the day we are born and the day we discover why.” – William Barclay
It can be easy to get caught up in the stress of planning celebrations and the pressure to say the right thing. But at the end of the day, your loved one will value the thought more than anything else, so don’t sweat the small stuff!
I thought my friend was the luckiest girl in the world.
I didn’t say it, but I was jealous that her boyfriend of 3 weeks did more for her birthday than my boyfriend of 2 years.
We were sorority sisters, and our shared birthday fell during Rush. This year, her new boyfriend went big, sending dozens of roses and a huge birthday banner to our sorority house that covered the staircase.
It was a grand and splashy gesture that made hundreds of girls simultaneously swoon. As a naïve 20-something, I thought he was madly in love. What I realize now (especially given the fact that they broke up soon after) was that he did it for attention – and was probably a narcissist.
Nobody warns girls about narcissists, yet they should. Why? Because narcissists are rampant in today’s world. They look like Prince Charming at first, making it easy to fool a girl with little life experience. And in the worst divorces I see, the husband shows signs of narcissism and mental abuse. I wouldn’t wish it on any girl, and that’s why our daughters need education on how to notice the signs.
The red flags were there – yet I ignored them. Many women said, "I could have saved myself years of heartache if I’d just trusted my instincts and that first red flag."
As females, we often tell ourselves we’re crazy, or let others tell us we’re crazy, or make excuses for people we love. But God gave us instincts, intuition, and the Holy Spirit for a purpose, and the more we listen to our inner radar, the stronger it gets.
So what are the red flags of a narcissist or a guy who may be mentally abusive? Everyone is different, but here are common clues to pay attention to.
1. He seems perfect at first. No guy begins as controlling or abusive, because what girl would ever stay? Instead, a narcissist starts off charming, strong, and too good to be true. He’ll spoil you, obsess over you, and make you feel phenomenal. He may mirror you, repeating your life goals so you think you’ve met your soul mate.
Winning you over through effusive compliments, fancy dinners, gifts, extravagant gestures, etc. slowly grooms you to trust him. By making you feel more loved, special, and understood than ever before, he creates a dynamic where you crave his praise and want to keep pleasing him.
Gut check: Value character over charisma. Think about who he is and how he acts behind closed doors. Was his lavish public display for you – or to make himself look good? How does he react when he doesn’t get what he wants or you tell him ‘no’?
2. He moves too fast, too soon. My friend married a narcissist who proposed after dating one month. She didn’t have time to see red flags, and when they emerged during the wedding planning process, it seemed too late. On their honeymoon he turned on her, yelling at her in a rage and showing a new side. This is common because narcissism escalates once they think they "own" you.
Gut check: Beware of a guy in a rush to get serious, who opens up faster or more deeply than normal. You may feel special and chosen, but this actually creates co-dependency. Anyone can be perfect short-term, so build trust slowly over time. Don’t believe declarations of love and forever from a guy who barely knows you.
3. He cares A LOT about his image. Many narcissists end up in powerful jobs (CEOs, doctors, lawyers, etc). They curate a stellar image and can sometimes snow everyone.
Narcissists in the upper-class are more likely to be mentally abusive than physically abusive because that doesn’t leave marks. In public, he may put on a show, but in private, he yells at you, critiques you, pulls your hair, grabs your arm, tells you how to dress and wear your hair, or gets mad at you for anything that makes him look like a bad person or less than perfect.
One narcissist I know made his family take their Christmas card picture in front of a huge home his company built to make it look like their home. He’d drive his family 30 minutes across town for dinner to be "seen" in an affluent area. He had a huge fancy car while his wife had no car. He was all about his image.
Gut check: Look deeper than a guy’s upbringing, appearance, family, education, job, salary, public behavior, or claim to be a "Christian." Just because he checks the boxes or even serves in ministry doesn’t mean he’s a good catch. Instead, look for humility and the fruit of the Holy Spirit.
4. He creates division in your relationships. This is HUGE. Good relationships draw you closer to the people who love you most, like your family and friends. Bad relationships create division.
A man once told his daughters, "If a boy ever tries to come between you and God, he wasn’t sent by God," and it’s true. A good guy will inspire the best version of you. He’ll strengthen your faith and closest relationships. A narcissist will make you feel isolated, insecure, and guilty for wanting to be with anyone but him.
Gut check: An abusive guy only wants you listening to him. He'll cut you off from your support system by demanding all your time and attention, dissing your friends, telling you to lie to your parents, or saying he’s the only one who really knows you. In marriage, he may move you away from your support system so nobody can raise concerns or help you leave. Feeling trapped makes you stay.
5. He has anger issues. A narcissist doesn’t like to lose, look inferior, or be told "no." He never admits he is wrong. So when life doesn’t go his way, his reaction can be scary.
What starts as a friendly argument with you may turn into yelling or rage. If you ace the LSAT and he fails it, he may get super-sarcastic or insult you in front of friends. He may be impressed with your athletic skills until you beat him in basketball. Punishment may look like the silent treatment, withdrawal, or turning on you fast.
Gut check: A guy who scares you with his words or anger or makes you walk on eggshells will only get worse with time. If you marry him, you’re putting yourself (and your children) in danger. Cut ties early before he feels like he owns you and feels rage over losing you.
6. His angry outbursts are followed by a sad story. A narcissist will flip his anger into a sad story to invoke sympathy, saying things like, "I’m sorry I yelled, my mom has cancer and I’m just worried", "My parents hate me and want to send me to boarding school", or "You can’t leave me, I have no reason to live without you.”
He may show extra emotion or apologize profusely through tears when he’s scared of losing you.
Girls who are caring, empathetic, eager to please, or quick to forgive and show grace make vulnerable prey. They may overlook bad behavior as they over-relate with the "hurt" part of the abuser. Narcissists often target tender-hearted girls because they try harder to make things work, sometimes to their own demise.
Gut check: Don’t accept tears or anguish about an unrelated personal issue as an excuse for verbal abuse. Don’t let a manipulator play on your tender heart. Don't stay because you feel sorry for him. There is a difference between a mistake and a major character flaw, and if a boy is toxic, setting boundaries with him protects your ability to live out God’s plan for you (for more, read the Boundaries books)
7. At times, the truth hits you. You know he is a mistake. In random moments of clarity, you'll know something is off. These moments may come when you’re away from him, when you have a sudden epiphany like That is not the father of my children, or when you’re scared of what may happen if you stay. Rather than push these clues down, reflect on them. Trust your instincts.
Gut check: Don’t settle for less than you deserve or ever feel like it’s too late to walk away. The right guy will give you a sense of peace, not unease, and make you want to stay.
8. He plays mind games, keeps you on a roller coaster, and changes your personality (for the worse). Your teacher may ask if everything’s okay because you don’t smile as much as you used to. Your parents may say, "Sweetie, this isn’t you" as you cry over your boyfriend’s texts. You may spend more time alone in your room isolated from friends. What should be a happy night – like being on homecoming court – may end in tears as he whispers that you look bad in your dress and have on too much makeup.
A narcissist will gaslight you. He’ll "turn on you" and then "turn on the praise" to create confusion and co-dependency. In therapy, co-dependency is often described through the frog story: If you put a put a frog into a pot of boiling water, he’ll jump out – but if you put a frog into a pot of lukewarm water and increase the heat gradually until it’s boiling, he’ll stay in the pot and die. Likewise, girls often adapt as relationships get worse and forget they have the power to leave.
Gut check: Even strong, capable, and accomplished girls can be broken down through mental and verbal abuse. A narcissist will strip you of your courage, voice, identity, self-esteem, and strength. He may orchestrate extreme highs – like an extravagant gift – to compensate for extreme lows. Don’t be fooled by his sweet or sensitive side, and don’t stay in a relationship that makes you a shell of your former self.
9. He’s jealous and controlling. A narcissist wants to control you. To avoid conflict or make him happy, you may accommodate him, but then he only gets worse.
He’ll control your relationships too – begging you to switch seats in Biology because he's jealous of your lab partner, forbidding you to talk to your best guy friends, blowing up your phone when his friends see you talking to a boy at the pizzeria, or texting you when you’re with friends to say, "If you really love me, you’ll leave your friends and come hang out with me." Technology makes it worse as he tracks where you are.
Before long, you’ll feel paranoid to talk to anyone who might trigger your boyfriend. You’ll lose your sense of friendship with girlfriends and center your life around him.
Gut check: You are your own person, and you need independence. Don’t let any boy be your dictator – or mistake his control as a sign of love or caring. Some guys who act "protective" are really taking away your freedom and encapsulating you.
10. He criticizes you, belittles you, or makes you feel dumb. A narcissist can dish criticism – but he can't take it. Initially, you may like his passionate personality as he plans fun or thoughtful dates, but you’ll soon doubt yourself as he dismisses your opinions, makes you feel incompetent, and gives you no say over decisions.
Gut check: A guy worth values your opinion, listens to you, builds your confidence, and sees you as more than just a beautiful girl who makes him look good.
11. He guilt-trips you and makes you feel responsible for his mistake. One girl’s high school boyfriend blamed her when he cheated. He called her crying and admitted that he'd done something terrible.
He'd hooked up with another girl, but he insisted it wasn't his fault because she came on strong – and she was willing to do things with him that his girlfriend wouldn’t due to strict boundaries.
Gut check: His mistake is not your fault. Don’t let him mess with your mind, guilt you into forgiving him, or distort reality. When a boy shifts blame to you, lies, cheats, or turns the table as you question him or call him out on a lie, don't just walk away — run. Healthy people take responsibility for their words and actions.
12. Your family or friends don’t like him. Mostly likely, someone will see red flags. You'll get angry if they express concern. Trust the people who have been part your life far longer than any boy. When multiple people get the same funny vibe – or when the situation gets so bad that your parents forbid you to see your boyfriend – it’s time to really listen.
Gut check: Those who know you best love you best. They’re willing to upset you to keep you from making a life-altering mistake. Ask yourself if what they say aligns with what you feel deep down. Chances are, it will.
Give yourself grace if you choose the wrong guy. Learn from it, move on, and don’t waste the lessons, because as many happily married women can attest, the wrong guys offer clarity on what you don’t want and refuse to put up with. They inspire you to find the exact opposite of what you left.
So notice the red flags and learn how healthy relationships work. Keep in mind these pointers:
• The best guys bring out the best version of yourself.
• Fear is never a good reason to stay. Neither is desperation.
• The longer you stay, the harder it is to leave. Cut ties early and let people help you when you don't feel strong enough.
• Infatuation can blind you. Listen when the people you trust voice concern.
• God speaks through instincts, intuition, and discernment. Trust your gut when you sense a boy leading you down a path that doesn’t align with God’s will.
• Know your worth and find your identity in Jesus so you don't settle for less than you deserve (the first chapter of my new book)
• If you run as fast as you can toward God, the right guy will come alongside you. You’ll look over one day and see him – and he’ll have to run harder just to get to you. Choose the guy who’s running the same race as you.
It felt like a fitting bookend, and I agree. While not all stories have a tidy conclusion, it’s a good reminder of what the future can hold. You never know what may be waiting for you on the other side of a bad relationship thanks to the unforgettable lessons you learn.
Posted by Kari on February 14, 2022
Hi friend! Thanks for taking time to visit! I'm a mom of four girls who lives in the South and believes in the power of stories and God's grace to change and transform lives.
Kari’s Books
More Than a Mom
Mothers are human too, and taking care of your needs strengthens you for the road ahead.
Love Her Well
Moms, our teenage daughters need us, and we need strength from God to love (and guide) them well.
10 Ultimate Truths Girls Should Know
These 10 simple truths will make one big change in your life.
Liked
What people say about you is opinion. What God says about you is fact. The way to know your worth is to focus on the facts.