I love giving ideas on amusing greetings to make someone laugh on their special day.
Happy birthday to you if yours is today. I know you're old . . . but try to smile. Enjoy!
• You would have loved the gift I didn’t bother getting you.
• When I have a birthday, I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
• You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
• Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
• Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
• When I was born, I was so surprised that I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
• Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
• With age comes wisdom. You’re one of the wisest people I know.
• The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.
• I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
• You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
• You’re birthday reminds me of the old Chinese scholar . . . Yung No Mo.
• I didn’t forget your birthday, I just forgot today’s date!
• You’re not 40, you’re 18 . . . with 22 years of experience!
• Birthdays are like boogers. The more you have, the harder it is to breathe!
• You may not be over the hill yet, but you have a great view!
• Old enough to know better, young enough to still do it.
• Happiness is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth. And that’s what you feel today. Happy Birthday.
• I’m just here for the cake.
• If you want to look young and thin on your birthday . . . then hang around a bunch of old, fat people.
• Just imagine the things you’d want to hear on your birthday . . . and assume I said them. Happy birthday!
• There are lots of good people in the world. One of them would like to wish you a happy birthday.
• A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday, but never remembers her age.
• Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.
• Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone just stood around and sang, "Happy Birthday."
• Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
• Looking 50 is great . . . if you’re 60.
• Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional.
• So far, this is the oldest I have ever been.
• It has been scientifically proven that too many birthdays will kill you.
• Don’t forget to wear your birthday suit . . . but check it for wrinkles first!
• You’re so old that when you looked at your birth certificate, it said expired.
• People say that the good die young, so I guess that make you an old badass!
• It’s proven that at the age of 41, you start to lose your memory. We can only hope!
• Another year, another new place that aches.
• It's okay to light the candles on your birthday cake now; I've already alerted the fire department.
• An old fart is as good as a new one.
• Don't think of it as getting older, think of it as becoming a classic.
• The younger you try to look, the older you actually are.
• Count your blessings, not your wrinkles.
• May you live as long as you want to, and want to as long as you live.
• Wishing you many more candles and a cake big enough to fit them all on.
• You have reached the age where all compliments will be followed by "for your age."
• Don't forget to wear your sunglasses when the cake is served. Happy birthday.
• The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune.
• No wise man ever wished to be younger.
• Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
• When I die, I want it to be on my 100th birthday, in my beach house on Maui, and I want my husband to be so upset that he has to drop out of college.
Happy birthday to you and yours!
xiansheng chen on July 05, 2022:
nice
navrajvir singh on November 23, 2022:
great
Laviza on September 24, 2022:
natty on September 07, 2022:
awesome quotes!
JeanReinhart on November 02, 2022:
Required gift ideas for my daughter already ordered a big cake and venue for celebration. but the gift is pending also if you have any best birthday wishes for daughter also send me it will be very greatfull.
tech3331 on January 28, 2022:
Wonderful article to read. Thanks for sharing this.
Marie Johnson12 on July 01, 2022:
ravi on April 01, 2022:
you can post even this video
Jeremy Rawlings on January 13, 2022:
Plenty of ideas all on the one hub!
lucas on January 13, 2022:
dd d d d d d
from Louisville, Ky on September 20, 2022:
Hi bac2basics,
First I would like to wish you a happy belated birthday. Im sorry to hear it wasn't great as all birthdays should be. Think about it this way; at least you have plenty more to come.. Im glad you enjoyed this hub and I wish you a great birthday next year.
from Louisville, Ky on September 20, 2022:
Jennzie,
Thanks for reading and happy early birthday...
Anne from Spain on September 20, 2022:
Hi Fresh. I couldn´t help but read this hub after seeing the photo..Hilarious. I love numbers 28 and 30. It actually was my birthday a week ago today, and I was having a really bad one..shame I hadn´t picked this great hub up then. Oh well never mind...maybe next year will be a great shin-dig. Thanks for the laugh.
Jenn from Pennsylvania on September 20, 2022:
My birthday's not for another 2 months but I still really enjoyed these quotes. 🙂 Voted up, funny and shared!
from Louisville, Ky on July 18, 2022:
Thanks tillsontitan! Im glad you enjoyed them. And yes, that is one of my favorites also. Thanks again for reading.
Mary Craig from New York on July 18, 2022:
These are a laugh riot! One is better than the other; among others I liked "Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest." Loved it!
Voted up and funny.
How Do You Say Happy Birthday To A Beautiful Girl?
You can wish Happy Birthday to a beautiful girl in a variety of ways. You can compliment her beauty and her adorable personality. You can wish your lovely lady a happy day or a happy year. You can use a short birthday message or write her a long birthday quote.
How Do You Write A Beautiful Birthday Message?
Write from the heart. A beautiful birthday message doesn't have to be complicated. Birthday sentiments that are short and cute, can also be beautiful. Start by saying happy birthday. Then write her a compliment. Perhaps commend her on her achievements. If you need to add more, then write down your sentiments on wishing her a good birthday or year.
Happy Birthday Beautiful Quotes
• Happy Birthday Beautiful, hope all your wishes come true on your special day!
• Happy birthday, sending happy thoughts to the most beautiful woman on earth!
• Happy Birthday to you! You are beautiful inside and out, and I hope you know that!
• Happy Birthday, wishing you a beautiful day today and every day!
• Sending birthday wishes to a beautiful lady! Celebrate big!
• Happy Birthday, pretty woman! You deserve the best!
• Happy birthday beautiful! Hope your day is a fabulous as you are!
• Wishing you a birthday as beautiful as you are, Happy Birthday!
• You are amazing, and I hope the world knows how beautiful and awesome you are! Happy birthday!
• You are just as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside and I wish you the very best on your birthday today!
• Sending loving wishes to the birthday girl today. Hope you have a beautiful celebrate and a magnificent year!
Happy Birthday Beautiful Friend Quotes
• Happy birthday to my beautiful friend, every day shines a little brighter with you in it.
• Hey gorgeous gal pal, wishing you an awesome birthday today!
• Hi beautiful bestie, I hope your birthday is awesome and your wishes come true!
• As charming as you are, it's no wonder everyone adores you, including me! Happy birthday beautiful friend!
• Happy birthday, good-looking! Sending you good vibes on your special day today!
• Hey hottie, Happy birthday to my sexy partner-in-crime!
• Hey foxy lady, have a fabulous birthday! I only wish I was half as fierce as you are!
• Happy birthday hot mama, sending you some wonderful birthday vibes on your special day today!
• To my beautiful friend, you deserve the very best on your birthday today! Have a spectacular birthday!
• Happy birthday, my beautiful bff! May we be friends forever and ever! Hope this is the best year yet!
Happy Birthday Beautiful Wife or Girlfriend Quotes
• Another year older, another year wiser, and you're still as beautiful as the day I met you, Happy birthday, my love!
• To my beautiful partner, every day with you is cause for celebration. Today just make its official, Happy birthday!
• Happy birthday to my beautiful wife, you get prettier every year!
• Happy birthday to my beautiful girlfriend, you're just as gorgeous as the day I met you!
• Happy Birthday! By the way… YOU ARE STUNNING. (but you already know that)
• Hoping for a gorgeous day for my gorgeous gal, Happy birthday sweetheart!
• Happy birthday hot stuff! I'm so lucky to call you mine.
• To my love of my life, you are beautiful, kind, smart, funny… and I can go and on… but this card wouldn't fit it all. Happy birthday!
• I love you today and everyday, happy birthday my beautiful angel!
• You take my breath away every day with how exquisite you are. Hope your beautiful smile shines brighter today on your birthday! Hope to celebrate many, many more birthdays with you!
Happy Birthday Beautiful Girl Quotes
• Happy birthday beautiful girl, did you know you light up my world?
• Sending hugs, kisses and birthday wishes to a beautiful girl!
• Happy birthday you gorgeous girl! I hope all your wishes come true!
• Happy birthday to a very special girl today! Sending you lots of love on your birthday!
• Hi cutie, Have a delightful birthday! Make this birthday one to remember!
Happy Birthday Beautiful Lady Quotes
• Happy Birthday to a lovely lady, one year older, and you still look amazing!
• You are aged to perfection, happy birthday lady!
• Hey pretty lady, wishing you a fabulous birthday today!
• You have a beautiful soul and it just shines, Happy Birthday to a wonderful lady!
• To a very special lady today, may all your birthday dreams and wishes come true!
Happy Birthday Beautiful Niece Quotes
• To my beautiful niece, you have brighten everyone's lives since you came into the family. hope you have a wonderful birthday!
• Happy birthday niece, you're still the cutie pie I remember. You're just another year older today. Hope your wishes come true!
• Sending birthday wishes to a wonderful niece. We're so blessed to have a beautiful soul like yours in our family.
• Happy birthday to you, our beautiful niece! Wishing you a day and year of laughter and love!
• Here's to wonderful birthday wishes for a beautiful niece! May your day be as delightful as you are!
Happy Birthday Beautiful Sister Quotes
• Happy birthday to my beautiful sister! You are so wonderful to me, and I'm luck to call you my sis!
• You're my sister, my friend, my confidante, wishing you a birthday that is as beautiful as you are!
• People say we look alike (which is good because I'm gorgeous) Happy birthday, sis!
• We love and we fight but we'll always be family. Happy birthday sister, hope it's a good one!
• Happy birthday beautiful sister. Hope your day is as sweet as you are!
Getting Older
By far the most common type of funny birthday wish is the one that makes fun of the person's age. Here are some hilarious examples.
• You're still hot after all these years… just not as hot as your birthday cake will be once all those candles are lit!
• Another birthday? You're going to need a bigger cake… or smaller candles!
• Don't fret over another birthday. You were already old.
• Happy Birthday! How does it feel to be REDACTED years old?
• Your birthday is the perfect time to recognize all your wonderful qualities, including the fact that you're older than me.
• Don't worry about having another birthday. Your body may be piling up the years, but your mental age continues to stagger along in the single digits.
• Let me be the first to wish you a Happy Birthday… and point out that you are older than dirt.
• Did you know that birthdays are good for you? Studies have shown that the more of them you have, the longer you live!
• Happy Birthday! I'm not saying you're old, but your birth certificate is on papyrus.
• Happy Birthday! There may be a few more wrinkles in your birthday suit, but you're still looking good!
• You look great for your age. Happy [age + 10] Birthday!
• Happy Birthday! Don't hurt yourself blowing out all those candles!
• Don't worry about turning a year older. Pretty soon you won't be able to remember your age anyway.
• It's your birthday! This is a big one. Then again, at your age, every birthday is a big one!
• I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk I'd sniff you before pouring you on my cereal.
• Happy Birthday! For everyone's safety, please skip the candles this year.
Overindulging
Here are some humorous birthday wishes that focus on drinking and other indulgences.
• May your birthday be filled with all the happiness and joy that an immoderate amount of alcohol can provide.
• May you have loads of fun on your birthday. Remember: Not only does wine getter better with age, but age gets better with wine!
• Hope you have a wild time tonight. Just keep in mind that “It was my birthday” is not an actual legal defense.
• I hope your birthday celebration is full of many memorable moments, and that you can actually remember some of them the next day.
• Follow These Steps: 1) Eat cake. 2) Get drunk. 3) Have hot sex. 4) Repeat until you've had a Happy Birthday.
• It's your birthday? As if you needed an excuse to act irresponsibly!
• Just because you're older doesn't mean you can't party all you want on your birthday. Of course, getting up the next morning may be a problem.
• It's your birthday! Time to drink beer and eat sheet cake until you barf.
• At last you've reached an age where it's time to eat healthy, exercise, and limit your consumption of alcohol. (Are you laughing yet? This is the funniest birthday wish I could think of.)
• Happy Birthday! If you wake up in a strange place tomorrow morning, you either 1) had too much to drink or 2) have gone senile. At your age, it could go either way.
• Hope you take plenty of pictures on your birthday. Just don't forget to delete the incriminating ones!
For Men
Here are some funny birthday messages specifically for a guy.
• Happy Birthday to a guy who still isn't showing his age… or acting it!
• Happy Birthday! Hope you consume plenty of cake, beer, and ED meds.
• Happy Birthday to a guy who's witty, manly, handsome… and reminds me a lot of myself!
• Happy Birthday! Don't worry – I would never make fun of your age. You might hit me with your walking cane!
• Sure, you've got more wrinkles, less hair, and your balls are sagging ever closer to your knees, but… eh, I got nothin'. Happy Birthday!
• Happy Birthday, man! I was going to arrange for a beautiful woman to jump out of a cake for you, but your age, it could trigger a heart attack.
For Women
Here are some funny birthday wishes for a lady.
• Happy Birthday to an old lady who still knows how to party!
• Happy Birthday to someone who's an even bigger diva than me!
• Remember: It's better to be a year older than a month late. Happy Birthday!
• It's your birthday! Turn up the sass, fill up your glass, and go kick some ass!
• Happy Birthday, lady! You keep looking young, and I'll keep refusing to tell people how old you really are. Deal?
More Funny Birthday Wishes
Finally, here are some miscellaneous birthday wishes to put a smile on someone's face.
• I didn't get you a gift or a card, but please accept this half-assed Happy Birthday wish sent via social media.
• Congrats on escaping the womb many years ago.
• Happy Birthday to someone who's not completely annoying most of the time.
• I was going to send you a big wad of cash for your birthday, but then I realized that just knowing me was enough of a gift.
• Congrats on avoiding death's clutches for another year.
• Your birthday is a good time to take stock of your life, remember all the good times, and marvel at the fact that you've managed to survive this long.